Disintegration

Valuing Water

“Many men go fishing all their lives without knowing that it is not fish they’re after.” Thoreau Thoreau understood the value that living on the pond had for him. Not just the beauty and quiet but water itself as offering something special. Today’s neuroscience verifies the value of all kinds of interaction with water, even just looking at it. The Thoreau quote came from a book surveying research on water called “Blue Mind” by Wallace J. Nichols. It presents a variety of studies on the benefits of water for both body and mind. Drinking water is important for physical and mental health. We sleep better if we’ve had enough water during the day. Experiments with rats showed cognitive decline when they were dehydrated. Just looking at water, even in images, is good for well-being. When hospital patients could look at water paintings, they had less anxiety. It was observed that blood pressure dropped when looking at an aquarium, a fact they must know at the cancer center where a big one sits in the middle of the waiting area. On the occasion of World Water Day it’s worthwhile to consider the many ways we are nourished by water and ways we might better care for it . The area of the brain most active when looking at nature, and in particular water, is the ventromedial prefrontal cortex. This is the area that judges value, knows what is important to us. The location is at the front of the brain, right between the eyes. This is also the location of the spiritual third eye, a concurrence that stimulates my imagination in multiple directions. Central to them is the attunement to the whole as our ultimate guide to what matters. Though beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, it is always something that feels right and connected to us in some way. What draws us relates to how we feel, what matches our personal state, aligns us. David Bohm said the creative act was a matter of finding what fits. What we choose to see is a creative act of finding what fits our state of being. A friend recently sent me a graphic that said in big letters “Quantum physics is where they hide the scientific proof of spirituality.” It was my reading of David Bohm and Nick Herbert and others that generated my sense that the non-locality at the quantum level of is consciousness. Water and sky are my primary symbols for consciousness. How tranquil or choppy provides a clear metaphoric quality, as is a stormy day or one that’s clear and bright. Though waves may look separate they are part of the same substance. I see one consciousness flowing through all of us. Though it may be filtered through our thoughts, desires and fears, the consciousness having a human experience comes through us, not from us.

Shells Within Shells

Context and Perception

Lately I’ve been making mistakes in what I first think I’m seeing that are likely due to the radical change in what has surrounded me for most of my time since Thanksgiving. Watching Jamie Raskin speak on TV, I thought the metal pole with something hanging behind him was an IV. Longer study showed it to be a grow light. But IV’s have been everywhere in my travels between hospital and cancer center accompanying my husband to endless appointments and treatments, so that’s what I now see. Being alert to these shifts of context remind me of how dependent perception is on the expectations conditioned by the recent surroundings. What we see in the present is always influenced by what we’ve seen the most recently and as that changes so do first impressions. Today surroundings are often on a screen. Spending large amounts of time with media makes what’s on the screen our surroundings and has the same level of influence, the same effect as physical location. When extreme media spends so much time tearing things down it builds a negative outlook. Things seem so much worse than they are. People can snap under the strain. Seeing or hearing negative attitudes repeatedly makes it more likely that we pick up those vibes elsewhere. As the extremes of right-wing opposition push some into a we/they mentality it can be good to remember that both sides worked together to get an infrastructure bill passed that was good for everybody using roads and bridges, not to mention all the many workers hired to do the work. Theses shifts help us recognize the fluid quality of perception as a reflection of our own mind and recent experience more than the world at large. What a person is immersed in is the reality they see. This is worrisome considering that there are people making a conscious effort to create fear and animosity regarding those who think differently. The world needs differences for all the many varied things that need doing. If the standard we’re held to is too narrow, most of us won’t fit. Growing up being judged builds a foundation insecurity that is easy to manipulate by those wishing to factionalize. Many were raised in a critical environment, criticism from teachers, parents, coaches, influencers. This creates a habit of criticizing others and an expectation of being criticized. Most people probably don’t realize that as we break the habit of criticizing others, it also makes us less hard on ourselves. Cultivating an attitude of acceptance may need time to develop, but feeling accepted is an antidote to antagonism.

Re-Enactment

Re-Enactment- The Story

I first posted “Enactment” this past August. As has happened before, once I saw it on the screen I saw I hadn’t taken it where I wanted it to be. Since I had an absorbing painting project underway it didn’t move fast but I was glad to have it when my husband went to the hospital over Thanksgiving. Just challenging enough to keep my attention the minimal thing I'd been working with was soothing to look at. Home from the hospital thinking he had a condition that could be controlled, a few days later we get a call that is much more dire. Meeting with the specialist it became even worse. I felt steamrolled by what he told us. So this drawiing got darker then lighter in what I finally started calling either palliative drawing or therappeutic drawing behavior. I don't know if it's improved but it 's been a safe place to eend each day after endless treatments, scans and doctors appointments. I've finally reached a place where I'm ready to stop and go on to express what's happening now.

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